Saturday, January 3, 2009


Here is a proposal I would somewhat like to make to DC comics.

Gotham city has been overrun by criminals, and none of them are as glamorous as the super-villains of old. Instead, this new breed of criminals is something deceptively evil: average. They are men, women, thieves and liars. They murder out of greed, rape out of lust and a desire to dominate, and generally speaking have no flair. Batman must up his tactics to beat them back, to restore order to a city where the average citizen has become a threat to all around them.

A man runs through alleyways, smiling at the thrill of the chase. He turns a corner and hazards a look behind him, seeing the fluttering caped crusader charging behind him, his feet pounding into the pavement with the force of jackhammers. He hits a dead end in the alley and begins trying to climb the fence. Batman's hand appears in a panel grabbing the back of the thug's jacket collar, his barbed gloves gleaming in the dim light.

The next panel shows the thug sprawled on his back, up on his elbows, frightened but almost laughing at the spectacle before him. Batman stands astride him wearing assless chaps as part of his usual costume. He leaps and catches the offender in the jaw with his boot. He straddles the young man's face, a boot on either side of his head, and shits in his mouth.

That's right. In order to stop the crime wave overtaking his beloved Gotham City, Batman was forced to resort to the most deadly tactics of all: Scat.


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